Ed Dorfman, winner of many awards and trophies for his barbecue and chili, says that the ambience of his restaurant (Texas Chili and Rib Company, Phoenix, Arizona) is that of a small Texas bar. Basically a carry-out, his “small joint” seats about thirty people who dig into his brisket, ribs, chicken wings, and several different kinds of chili. About his love for chiles, he calls himself a “capsaicin-holic” who uses chile in everything he cooks–note the eight chile-related ingredients of this recipe.

Ingredients

• ½ pound bacon with fat

• 2 pounds Spanish onions, chopped fine

• 5 tablespoons New Mexican red chile powder

• 2 tablespoons cayenne powder

• 4 jalapeño chiles, stems and seeds removed, chopped

• ½ cup canned New Mexican green chile, chopped

• 1 dried red New Mexican chile pod, stem removed

• 1 pound Italian hot sausage

• Dash Tabasco hot sauce

• 1 teaspoon Hungarian hot paprika

• 3 pounds crushed Italian tomatoes

• 1 tablespoon Mexican oregano

• 10 ounces T-bone steak, chopped fine

• 5 pounds coarsely ground chuck

• 1½ cups water

• 1 bottle Lone Star Beer

• 2 teaspoons salt

• 1½ cups chopped bell pepper

• 1 tablespoon garlic in oil, chopped

• 2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce

• 1 tablespoon raw sugar

• 5 tablespoons cumin

• 1 pound fresh armadillo meat (optional)

Instructions

Fry the bacon in a soup kettle, add the onion, and saut until soft. Add the remaining ingredients and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer for about two hours, stirring frequently.

This recipe wreaks havoc on your lawn, but hell, grass grows back!

Ingredients

• 1 40 to 50 pound suckling pig, cleaned and hair removed

For the Rub:

• 3 cups paprika

• 1 cup ground cayenne

• 1 cup dried coconut flakes

• ½ cup garlic powder

• 1/4 cup freshly ground black pepper

• 1/4 cup dried thyme

• 1/4 cup dried oregano

• 1/4 cup onion powder

• 1/8 cup salt

• 3 tablespoons ground allspice

For the Sauce:

• 2 15 ½-ounce can sliced pineapple chunks, drained and liquid reserved

• 1 cup catsup

• ½ cup brown sugar

• 1 teaspoon lemon juice

• ½ cup bourbon (drink the rest of the bottle during the 10 hours of pig roasting)

• 1 teaspoon dried ground habanero chile or 2 fresh, stems and seeds removed, minced

• 2 teaspoons ground ginger

• 2 teaspoon salt

• 1 teaspoon soy sauce

• 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

• ½ teaspoon ground nutmeg

• ½ teaspoon ground allspice

Instructions

For the Pig:

The entire carcass of the pig can be roasted in a closed pit. Dig a hole 3 feet deep, 30 inches wide and of sufficient length to accommodate the pig. Build a wood fire in the pit and allow 12 inches of hot coals to build up. This will require about 3 to 4 hours burning time and wood equal to about 2 times the volume of the pit. Use only dry hardwood.

When sufficient coals have accumulated, level them and remove any unburned chunks. Cover the coals completely with a 2-inch layer of pea gravel. Rub the carcass with the Polynesian Pig Rub. Wrap the carcass in wet burlap bags or old (but clean) t-shirts, cut apart. Place the wrapped carcass on a sheet of 2 by 4 inch welded wire, and lower it into the pit. Cover immediately with galvanized roofing supported on pipe or steel posts. Then put 12 inches of dirt over the entire pit. Allow the pig to cook for about 10 hours (or until the internal temperature of the pig reaches 160° F–but you have to dig it up to find out!). Serve the meat dressed with the South Pacific Barbecue Sauce.

 For the Rub:

Combine all the ingredients in a bowl and mix well.

For the Sauce:

Place the pineapple in a blender or food processor and puree until smooth.

Combine the puree and all the remaining ingredients, including the pineapple liquid, in a saucepan. Bring to a boil, reduce the heat and simmer over medium-low heat for 15 minutes, stirring occasionally until it thickens. If prepared ahead of time, refrigerate, and reheat before using.